(Taken from the March 2003 issue of  "The Vincent Clatter" with help from Paul.)

    Lit another bike on fire last week.  Usually when starting a bike with no air filter I have a fire extinguisher nearby, but this was an old freebie  Honda 750 and I was rushing as a buyer was on the way over.

    As I raced to the garage and fire extinguisher my right clog flew off and I kicked the door jamb barefoot with full force.  About 35 degrees out that morning.   Didn’t really hurt until after I got the fire out and my adrenaline rush subsided.  I did have a noticeable limp though as I helped load the bike.  “Oh it’s nothing, used to ride a kick start Sportster”, I said while inconspicuously wiping a bit of white powder off the bike.

    So there is a lesson there, as BSA clubber and retired fireman Old Ed Meagor preaches.  Of course I still haven’t figured it out.  I nearly burned a nice BMW R80GS to the ground a couple years ago the same way. That time I ran for the garden hose, squeezed the trigger, nothing. Wasn’t screwed into the spigot.   By the way I’m taking on side work.

    Then, later that evening, I found myself out back rechecking the tank decals I had slapped on a Commando earlier that day.  Ever notice that sometimes after a days work in the shop, when you finally settle down and think about what you got accomplished, you wind up back out there second guessing your work?  As I bent over  and rubbed a tiny air bubble trapped
under one decal I could feel the gas tank of my new Velo KTT behind me with my BFA (Big Fat Ass).  Next thing I know I can’t feel it anymore and the little KTT is on it’s way over the other side.  I got lucky and the Smith’s Chrono hit the handle of my bench vise and stopped it from falling all the way over.  Only damage a bent gauge mount.

I work on Vincents too.

    Two days after the Honda BBQ I decided the timing on the Velo needed checking.  After attaching my vintage Hap Jones degree wheel to the exposed drive side end of the crank and getting the timing set I figured I’d leave it on for a quick spin around the block in case I wanted to change things.  Bet you can guess what happened next.  Just about topped out  in first when I heard this FAWANG! And look to see the degree wheel launch itself into the air at full song.  It flew ahead of me in perfect view, first flying horizontal to an altitude of about 20 feet, then leveling off into perfect vertical flight for a looong way over a row of parked cars lining the street. Think of an aluminum Frisbee spinning at 6,000 rpm.  I tried to make myself invisible (not easy when riding a bike with number plates and open megaphone) as I cringed and pondered what the
outcome of this might be, having just watched “Odd Job’s” performance on the James Bond marathon.  Luckily it finally came down in the gutter with no personal or property damage other than to the degree wheel itself.  Wonder if JC Taylor would have covered that one?

I do tune ups and am happy to test ride your bike.